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Dear Joseph:

I just want to spend money on things for myself. It makes me feel productive until after I spend it.

Speaking of, the Alicia Keys musical is going to Broadway.

Today I smelled gas and thought it was a phantom scent. Then it was stronger, and just as I was leaving, I realized I hadn't turned the stove all the way off when I boiled the water. All throughout the service, I kept worrying that maybe I'd come back and find out I blew up the building. It was such an outlandish thought that I didn't take it seriously, but that's exactly the kind of thing you wouldn't take seriously until it happened.